Habits of Self Care
The mission of Self Care for Busy People is to help you strengthen your self-care practices so that you experience less stress, more balance, and more peace on a daily basis. The way to do this is to make self-care a priority and how that works is to make it a habit. You bring the desire, we offer the tools and process to help you experiment your way forward!
As I shared in the Habits of Self Care video, many years ago I started incorporating a habit hack I had heard about —if you’re having trouble sticking with your habits, break them down into small wins for a timeframe that doesn’t feel so big and challenging.
For instance, if you have committed to walking or running a certain amount each week and one day you don’t really feel like it, just go for 5 minutes.
Digging into the science of this concept of small wins, is James Clear, author of Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones. Thanks James, you’re speaking our language! James explains that we underestimate the value of making small (think atomic-size) improvements on a daily basis. He says, “…if you can get 1 percent better each day for one year, you’ll end up thirty-seven times better by the time you’re done.” Whoa – that’s incredible.
Important point #1: Small wins make a big difference
Another key strategy Mr. Clear shares is focusing on systems over goals. At first, I was like “What”? We’ve all been taught the power of goals (and to make them S.M.A.R.T- specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and time-bound). But nope. Everyone can set goals, he says, but it’s the degree to which you set and execute clear systems that generates results – so focus on your systems.
Important point #2 – You rise to the level of your systems
Next up is this concept of focusing on our identity if we want to shape our habits. This is where that idea I shared around thinking about who you want to be when it comes to these self-care habits. You'll get a chance to play with this concept when we get to C for Clarity.
In the meantime, consider:
Important point #3 – Decide who you wish to become and prove it with small wins
Building self-care habits is a practice, not a destination. Our needs and lifestyles are ever-changing and being more intentional about our daily habits requires a level of ongoing awareness and adjustment over time. Building a habit has its own learning curve. At first, adding in (or removing) a habit can feel clunky. But, as we stick with it, it becomes more familiar, comfortable. In fact, once the behavior is repeated enough, it becomes automatic. Our habits free up processing space in our brain so we can attend to new and novel problems.
How helpful would it be to your mental wellbeing and creative ability if your self-care practice was stronger and habituated? Listen to the video where Marnee shares how getting her exercise in each morning frees her to enjoy her day.
Important point #4 – Habits free up mental space
Finally, and this is probably the most important - self care, by definition, needs to be an enjoyable practice. There needs to be a certain level of enjoyment for it to contribute to your greater good, and all the dimensions of your wellbeing. This doesn't mean that it doesn't take some discipline. You'll hear in the podcast during A for Assess week, that I have so habituated my core strengthening exercises that I totally forgot to log it. The thing is, I didn't enjoy these exercises for quite some time, maybe even a year, but I needed to do them. Now I love doing them not only for how they 'support' me during the day, but now I actually enjoy them while I am doing them - they are a mini self-care break each day and I can just relax, breathe, and get in sync with my body. It feels great!
Important point #5 - A good self care practice is enjoyable (mostly)
